One thing that’s been on my mind lately is how much we care about what other people think.
It’s become more fascinating to me the more I’ve realized how universal this really is. Hand up — I genuinely thought I was the only one for a long time (lol).
Let Me Share a Quick Story
In 2025, I became a founding member of a new financial planning designation called the Integrative Wealth Advisor, as some of you know (more to come on that).
This founding cohort was stacked with individuals who, from the outside, seem like they have it all figured out. They’re older than me. Wealthier. More established. Many of them have built successful firms, families, and lives that look incredibly solid.
Naturally, I walked into that space with a bit of imposter syndrome.
But as we started going deeper — talking honestly about fears, internal narratives, and the things that quietly get in our way — the same underlying fear kept showing up. Over and over again.
And...it was my main fear too.
Judgement. More specifically, judgment from others.
Fear of being misunderstood. Fear of being seen as not enough. Fear of saying the wrong thing. Fear of doing the “right” thing and still being questioned for it.
That experience stuck with me because it wasn’t just me. And it wasn’t just them. It was most of us. Even the people you’d never expect — the ones who seem confident, grounded, and unbothered. Yes. Even them!
I think part of the reason this fear is so powerful is because it’s internal. No one can really talk you out of it. You don’t “logic” your way through it. You feel it… and then you either let it run the show, or you move anyway.
As I type this today, I’m about a year into consistently posting on social media. I won’t pretend the fear ever fully disappears. There’s still a moment before hitting “post” where that subtle anxiety creeps in.
A swirl of thoughts like: What will my friends think? What will other advisors think? Did I miss something? Should I read this one more time? The overthinking is very real.
But I can say this… it does get easier. The first post was the hardest by far. The second wasn’t much better. Somewhere along the way, you start realizing something kind of freeing:
Nobody really cares.
The fear itself is, well, mostly made up. It feels real, but it isn’t. People are busy. They’re in their own heads. And the spotlight we think we’re standing under usually isn’t even on. It’s actually funny…and humbling!
At some point, you realize most people aren’t watching as closely as you think. And the few who do have strong opinions usually aren’t the people you’re trying to help anyway.
I’ve started to embrace what I jokingly call:
The art of being cringe.
Saying the thing that feels a little uncomfortable. Showing up before it’s polished. Letting yourself be seen while you’re still figuring it out.
Every creator, builder, or thinker who’s doing meaningful work went through this phase. They practiced…publicly…awkwardly. And they survived.
After all — you’re not dying… lol.
You should see my first video. It’s objectively bad (in a wholesome way). And at the time, it felt like a big deal. Looking back? Nobody cared. And the people who did respond were kind, encouraging, and real.
What’s even more interesting is how this same fear of judgment shows up far beyond social media.
People delay getting financial help because they’re embarrassed to admit they don’t understand something. They hesitate to make changes because they’re worried how a decision will look to others. They stay stuck in situations that don’t feel aligned because explaining a shift feels harder than staying quiet.
Often, it's this that stalls progress. People get stuck because they’re worried about how it will look.
Progress is uncomfortable. It just is.
Growth usually asks us to care a little less about perception and a little more about direction. There’s a point where self-awareness stops being useful and starts becoming a restraint.
This past month had me reflecting on that line — where awareness turns into hesitation. Where caution becomes inertia.
That’s been sitting with me lately.
Thanks for being here. Truly. Cheers.
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